PDA

View Full Version : Uncivil War V - Official draw thread



SundayHack
17th January 2017, 07:30 PM
As Union captain I am proud to announce the First Lady VC in Uncivil War history, Shazza_rs as my vice this year.

WBennett
17th January 2017, 07:33 PM
An outstanding selection Hack. She can mop your tears after your inevitable loss.

SundayHack
17th January 2017, 07:34 PM
Im just hoping she doesn't do a Julia

LarryLong
17th January 2017, 07:36 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure to announce that my VC for the Uncivil War will be Tasmania's finest, BenM. Ben has been a loyal confederate soldier in all of our campaigns, which means he's been on the winning side most of the time. He's had a mixed record in the match play, but this year he's a completely new man after changing his outlook, deciding to live on a different sort of liquid diet and losing half his body weight. Fortunately he hasn't lost any of his golfing ability (or his handicap) which means he'll be a formidable opponent for Shazza, even if it is going to be two against one. :)

SundayHack
17th January 2017, 07:43 PM
Nice last time they met
Shazza wiped the floor with him. 5/4 I believe

We will open with 2 Sydney Snipers in Sargent Dotty (10) and too match Dotty's experience we send out rookie KristianJ (9.0)

LarryLong
17th January 2017, 08:11 PM
Sorry folks, work just called. Back on deck now.

Taking on the pair of snippers (experts in circumcision? I dunno) are a couple of men who will refuse to be snipped.

I hear KristianJ is a bit of a bomber, but he's going to have to get used to playing his second shot first because Spanner will be 30m up the fairway (or in the rough) waiting for him all day long. KJ's inexperience will be no match for Spanner's intimate knowledge of the course - so intimate in fact, that he built it, raised the grass from wee seedlings and knows every worm by name. Word has it that some of the worms even owe some of their ancestry to him, but I won't go there. He knows the place.

Meanwhile, while Spanner is waiting for Dotty to play his second before he can reach for an iron, Dotty will be trying to deal with the unrelentingly solid game of Monsta. Sure, people will be skeptical here, but the only way to combat a bloke who almost 100 rounds last year is to put him up against a bloke who played EVEN MORE rounds last year. Monsta has had a bad run in recent years, but I'm confident that this is the year that he's going to turn it around and win the whole thing.

LarryLong
17th January 2017, 08:22 PM
Kicking off the second group is a man who needs no introduction. He's the reigning champion captain, and a proven winner. Who could forget his systematic destruction of AndyP with a clutch 20-foot putt on the last after being 4 down at the turn? He's a man in the form of his life, dipping well into single figures, and he's here for business. He has called Courty out and we'll see if the mild mannered public servant is up for the challenge. He is, of course, wbennett.

Backing him up will be a man who is new to the forum, and new to the game, but his handicap is tumbling like an OzGolfer on ouzo. He is Slug. He's the classic dark horse, but I've played a round with him and I can tell you that he looks stupidly solid for a bloke who only recently started his golfing journey. As a reformed Queenslander now living in Victoria he's obviously got great judgement, and I think he'll be able to handle all comers.

SundayHack
17th January 2017, 08:33 PM
It would only show weakness if I was not to accept the only challenge laid down. Courty may not have the record in Uncivil War that he would like but this is only Spud after all. Spud, you get your wish and I pity the fool.
"Slug" guns are useless in a war where you have a man that everyone knows ain't shooting blanks... I'll match your Slug with a man that has won it all before. The guy who doesn't miss his target. The quiet assassin..Peter_rs.

SundayHack
17th January 2017, 08:37 PM
Time to unleash the men with more shots then an old Gatling. Solarman and Rickie Prowler.

LarryLong
17th January 2017, 08:52 PM
Matching up against Solarman is a difficult assignment, but we're going to counter his crazy brand of mental disintegration with a bloke who might just have him covered in that department, as well as having him well and truly covered in the golfing department. He's a former winning captain who has just become a single figure golfer for the first time in his life, so his form is hot and he's almost impossible to beat at the best of times. Andigold will take Solarman down, and even if he doesn't this will probably be the most entertaining group in the history of OzGolf.

When you've got that level of sledge going on on one side of the matchup, you need a guy who can hold his own in a sea of stupidity and keep his mind focussed. You need a WAnker. Our secret weapon is Adlo. Rory learned his craft chipping into a washing machine, but Adlo went one better and fine tuned his swing by smashing balls into a fridge. White goods are the key to good golf. Adlo has been on a bit of a hiatus for a few years serving coffee and tunes to the hipsters of Perth, but he's back in the game now, and Rory beats Ricky every day of the week.

LarryLong
17th January 2017, 08:59 PM
My last pairing is a perfect blend of erratic brilliance and German level precision. These two will be unstoppable.

First, we have Oldracer. I played with our hero a few years ago in the uncivil war, and I've never seen somebody have so many 4-pointers in a round of golf in my life. I was fearing for his safety, but he didn't care, he just kept rattling them off. He lives in the country, so you know he knows a thing or two about farming, and with a handicap of 17.5 his opponent is going to be tearing his hair out every time he flushes one with his sexy Miuras.

His partner needs no introduction. He's a dual uncivil war winning captain, unbackable favourite for the gross, a better dresser than Courty, and unbeatable in matchplay. He has eased off the throttle nicely this year and comes in with a handicap that is unattainable for most, but dead set highway robbery for him. It's going to take a supreme effort to get anywhere near our resident flusher, LeftyHoges.

SundayHack
17th January 2017, 09:08 PM
Oldracer maybe underfeated in the uncivil war but the north has an underfeated weapon themselves. I'll see your naga bus driver with the former winning Union captain, who ain't afraid to take on any chopper.... Captain Nemo.
Leftyhoges maybe the biggest gun in your arsenal. To combat that sort of weaponry we have sent a former Sydneysider south as a double agent. He is another rookie but don't be mistaken this guy has all the skills to take down your best. I give to you our biggest gun Sydney Hack.

SundayHack
17th January 2017, 09:11 PM
So there it is your Uncivil War V teams and matchup. Bring it on.

LarryLong
17th January 2017, 09:18 PM
There it is folks, the draw is done. To recap:

Group 1
Dotty vs Monsta
KJ vs Spanner

Group 2
Benno vs Courty
Slug vs Peter_RS

Group 3
Solarman vs Andigold
Rickie Prowler vs Adlo

Group 4
Oldracer vs Captain Nemo
Lefty vs Sydney Hacker

Group 5
Larry vs SundayHack
BenM vs Shazza

Good luck to all!

Courty
17th January 2017, 09:33 PM
I'm so fired up now, someone's gonna have to hold me back from causing Spud physical harm before we get to the 1st tee. :p

SundayHack
17th January 2017, 09:37 PM
I'm so fired up now, someone's gonna have to hold me back from causing Spud physical harm before we get to the 1st tee. :p
Unleash all your fury.

PeteyD
17th January 2017, 09:39 PM
Release the Courty!

AndyP
17th January 2017, 09:57 PM
4 down? How big was that fish again?


I'm so fired up now, someone's gonna have to hold me back from causing Spud physical harm before we get to the 1st tee. :p
At least you are safe from beer poisoning.

LarryLong
17th January 2017, 10:09 PM
4 down? How big was that fish again?

He thought it was a Big Fish, but it turned out that it wasn't so big after all.

LeftyHoges
17th January 2017, 10:17 PM
Some genuine gold in here boys. Very well done, and much thanks for carrying on the spirit of the greatest rivalry in earth. Ryder Cup? Pah! The Ashes? Meh. Tottenham v Arsenal. Pffft. They all got nothin!!!!

As an aside, I think Benno was 5 down thru 9 against Iain and got the vital half in UW I, but it's all just semantics really. We know he's never to be discounted.

Dcanto
17th January 2017, 11:08 PM
I'm so fired up now, someone's gonna have to hold me back from causing Spud physical harm before we get to the 1st tee. :p

44223

Dotty
18th January 2017, 04:33 AM
Dotty vs Monsta ?

Out of sight, out of mind.

Captain Nemo
18th January 2017, 05:28 AM
Lol, Al you might not get that Ping tip in s hurry!!

WBennett
18th January 2017, 05:59 AM
4 down? How big was that fish again?At least you are safe from beer poisoning. I was 4 down at the turn vs Iain the year before.I just tore your heart out and threw it in the ground at 18 RMW

oldracer
18th January 2017, 06:12 AM
Lol, Al you might not get that Ping tip in s hurry!!just what I was thinkin' L

Monsta
18th January 2017, 06:45 AM
Dotty vs Monsta ?

Out of sight, out of mind.

Nothing funnier than seeing two old blokes "duke it out"............

Dotty
18th January 2017, 11:20 AM
Nothing funnier than seeing two old blokes "duke it out"............
Randolph! Randolph!

Mortimer, we're back!

KristianJ
18th January 2017, 12:27 PM
Nothing funnier than seeing two old blokes "duke it out"............ I'll bring a camera crew then. :P

BenM
18th January 2017, 01:01 PM
I've been training for this all year.

Look out Shazza, I got a score to settle =P~

Monsta
18th January 2017, 05:34 PM
Randolph! Randolph!

Mortimer, we're back!
44226
Your going down old man........

andigold
3rd February 2017, 01:05 PM
Quick update substituting GK for Sydney Hacker



Group 1
Dotty vs Monsta
KJ vs Spanner

Group 2
Benno vs Courty
Slug vs Peter_RS

Group 3
Solarman vs Andigold
Rickie Prowler vs Adlo

Group 4
Oldracer vs Captain Nemo
Lefty vs GK

Group 5
Larry vs SundayHack
BenM vs Shazza

WBennett
3rd February 2017, 01:08 PM
Gk - filthy traitor!

backintheswing
3rd February 2017, 01:35 PM
Wonder if GK has another 46 points in him?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

G.K
3rd February 2017, 01:43 PM
I'm well overdue for a good score, but I would be highly surprised if I was to ever have 46 points again for the rest of my life. Especially not around Commonwealth!