Ask SMS316

[LeftyHoges]

I don't expect this thread to last long AT ALL but so long as he answers this question I'll be happy... :mrgreen:

I thought you'd probably be the most expert person to answer this:
How long am I expected to keep a mates Jim Beam Devil's Cut cans before drinking them after he left them in my esky Christmas Eve?

Lots of Love,
Lefty xox

[Jarro]

How come you can't keep a job in the golfing industry ?

[Webster]

SMS, when and where are the 2013 Ozgolf QLD Champs?

[Pencil]

What is the best length for a belly putter?

[Johnny Canuck]

What champs were better this year?

[mike]

Why didn't you take more pics of Blondie?

[IamViva]

sms, in your opinion who is odds on favourite for the champs in 2013 and is it possible they could take out the grand slam/triple crown?

[timah!]

Do you miss Dave1?

[Johnny Canuck]

sms, in your opinion who is odds on favourite for the champs in 2013 and is it possible they could take out the grand slam/triple crown?

Why waste a question when we all know the answer is DC68?

[IamViva]

stop threadjacking this is all about sms!!!

[Dotty]

What measures should Gillard instigate to reduce the impact on Australians, by the looming US fiscal cliff problem?

[sms316]

I don't expect this thread to last long AT ALL but so long as he answers this question I'll be happy... :mrgreen:I thought you'd probably be the most expert person to answer this:How long am I expected to keep a mates Jim Beam Devil's Cut cans before drinking them after he left them in my esky Christmas Eve?Lots of Love,Lefty xoxBeing a ranga, you should be doing everything you can to keep the mates that you have.

[sms316]

How come you can't keep a job in the golfing industry ? Somebody else's fault. Probably Gillard.

[sms316]

SMS, when and where are the 2013 Ozgolf QLD Champs? Who the **** knows? The Club 14 Challenge will probably take place first.

[sms316]

What is the best length for a belly putter? 34 inches

[sms316]

What champs were better this year? No contest. The WA Champs.

[PeteyD]

When are you going to learn to use the mutli-quote feature?

[sms316]

Why didn't you take more pics of Blondie?Being arrested wouldn't have been good for my career.

[sms316]

sms, in your opinion who is odds on favourite for the champs in 2013 and is it possible they could take out the grand slam/triple crown? You really should be asking who is most likely to come second.

[sms316]

Do you miss Dave1? I miss Zigwah more.

[sms316]

What measures should Gillard instigate to reduce the impact on Australians, by the looming US fiscal cliff problem? Dissolve parliament and call an election.

[mudrat]

What's the best cure for a hangover?

[sms316]

What's the best cure for a hangover? Jim Beam Devil's Cut.

[Captain Nemo]

SMS, new year upon us thinking of giving the g banger a go.
What's your preferred material, and how do they fair up over 18 holes, any chaffing?

[WBennett]

Does Mrs SMS have a Facebook account?

[Monsta]

SMS

Why am I still having nightmares about a lefthanded golfer in a white shirt and horrid pink shorts??????

[sms316]

SMS, new year upon us thinking of giving the g banger a go. What's your preferred material, and how do they fair up over 18 holes, any chaffing? Welcome to the club. They provide ample support yet still give the feeling of being free and wild. I prefer satin.Never worn on the course though. Some fear of jock rot there.

[sms316]

Does Mrs SMS have a Facebook account? No. I suspect you already knew that.

[sms316]

SMSWhy am I still having nightmares about a lefthanded golfer in a white shirt and horrid pink shorts?????? Because you are from Orange and wouldn't know style if it bit you on the arse.

[Dotty]

Is it wrong for me to think of Officer Dibble from Top Cat, when I see photos of you in your work gear?

[sms316]

Is it wrong for me to think of Officer Dibble from Top Cat, when I see photos of you in your work gear? Sure beats some of the alternatives.

[Dotty]

Sure beats some of the alternatives.
Like the one that Scooby Doo calls Rief Riggum?

[squishy]

What else should we ban since the belly putter is gone ??

[Webster]

SMS, why is TGF dying in the arse?

[sms316]

What else should we ban since the belly putter is gone ?? Puma clothing, slow golfers, people with handicaps above 18, women, hybrids.

[sms316]

SMS, why is TGF dying in the arse? Closure of The Pub. The Top Ten threads were quality. Being so Viccentric doesn't help, although that is slowly changing. Geez, I almost wish that Dennis posted more.

[PeteyD]

Why ban Hybrids? Plenty of old clubs look the same. Certainly a lot more in common with the older clubs than the bigass drivers we use.

[Marto65]

On long trips away, should you let your wife drive the car?

[Dotty]

Should Hawaiian shirts be allowed on the course?

[sms316]

Why ban Hybrids? Plenty of old clubs look the same. Certainly a lot more in common with the older clubs than the bigass drivers we use. I am amused that was the one you picked out. I'll assume you agree with the rest. I just think that hitting a long iron is a skill that should be rewarded. It will never happen though.

[sms316]

On long trips away, should you let your wife drive the car? Definitely. In the last couple of hours while I'm drinking stubbies.

[PeteyD]

I am amused that was the one you picked out. I'll assume you agree with the rest. I just think that hitting a long iron is a skill that should be rewarded. It will never happen though.

No i don't because I believe the sport should be inclusive. But you can get rid of handicap pennant. isn't the long iron hybrid thing more to do with the ball?

[sms316]

Should Hawaiian shirts be allowed on the course? Sure. As long as they are tucked in.

[squishy]

Is there a rule of thumb for how many beers you must consume on the course ?

[Dotty]

Did anything eventuate from your 2010 speculation to get a right-handed handicap?

[squishy]

Where is Rory practicing while in Brisbane ?

[sms316]

No i don't because I believe the sport should be inclusive. But you can get rid of handicap pennant. isn't the long iron hybrid thing more to do with the ball? Agree with handicap pennant.

[sms316]

Is there a rule of thumb for how many beers you must consume on the course ? 3 per nine is my happy medium. I went for 4 per nine at Albury last week and that worked out ok.

[Dotty]

At what age should one stop imitating Rickie Fowler (orange shirt, orange cap and orange golf bag)?

[sms316]

At what age should one stop imitating Rickie Fowler (orange shirt, orange cap and orange golf bag)? Puberty.

[sms316]

Where is Rory practicing while in Brisbane ? Vic Park.

[Lagerlover]

Should the steeplechase be banned?

[LeftyHoges]

How long am I expected to keep a mates Jim Beam Devil's Cut cans before drinking them after he left them in my esky Christmas Eve?Lots of Love,Lefty xoxScratch that question anyway. They taste like a wet dogs bollox. No danger of me drinking them.

[sms316]

Should the steeplechase be banned? No way. The occasional death of an animal reiterates man's position at the top of the evolutionary tree.

[Dotty]

Peter Senior. Legend or villian?

[sms316]

Peter Senior. Legend or villian? Great bloke, but a man with a false career. Villain.

[Marto65]

Do you think this thread will be bigger than Lefty's Fashion Thread?

And ... who used the shower after you in Perth?

[sms316]

Do you think this thread will be bigger than Lefty's Fashion Thread?And ... who used the shower after you in Perth? No way. Lefty's thread attracts homos. I had the last shower in WA.

[Dotty]

Will the migration north continue, and you relocate to Cairns before 2014?

[sms316]

Will the migration north continue, and you relocate to Cairns before 2014? Hell no. Too many spooks up there.

[jaybam]

Women have just as much right to be on the course as left handed golfers. They are both wrong but we have to put up with it.

[Dotty]

Is it unethical to harvest hair plugs from a Champs roommate?

If convicted, I plan to use Doug Bollinger as a precedent.

[sms316]

Is it unethical to harvest hair plugs from a Champs roommate? If convicted, I plan to use Doug Bollinger as a precedent. You should room with dc68. He'll harvest the hair for you. Just don't ask where they are from.

[markTHEblake]

SMS. If you woke up naked in a hotel room with a condom sticking out of your bum, would you tell anyone about it?

[Dotty]

You should room with dc68. He'll harvest the hair for you. Just don't ask where they are from.
I was planning on PeteyD. There's enough for me, Eag's and Matty, and Pete still wouldn't notice any difference.

[WBennett]

No. I suspect you already knew that.

Perhaps.... :lol:

[WBennett]

At what age should one stop imitating Rickie Fowler (orange shirt, orange cap and orange golf bag)?

You bastard

[sms316]

SMS. If you woke up naked in a hotel room with a condom sticking out of your bum, would you tell anyone about it? How many stars is the hotel?

[Monsta]

At what age should one stop imitating Rickie Fowler (orange shirt, orange cap and orange golf bag)?


You bastard

Dont worry Benno, you still got a year or two before you hit puberty :lol:

[Haystacks]

SMS, Who put the bomp In the bomp bah bomp bah bomp?

[sms316]

SMS, Who put the bomp In the bomp bah bomp bah bomp? One Direction.

[Lagerlover]

How do I soften the front of my undies?

[Monsta]

Take it easy on him boys............

21514

[Courty]

Will the migration north continue, and you relocate to Cairns before 2014?

Solarman will have a spare room when the last of his kids goes to uni next year.

[rubin]

Take it easy on him boys............

21514

the funny thing is - it kinda looks like him too

[markTHEblake]

How many stars is the hotel?
Suggest you imagine the scenario is silk sheets and mirror on the ceiling so it would have to be 5.

[jaybam]

Sms have you submitted all your aliases before the deadline?

[sms316]

Suggest you imagine the scenario is silk sheets and mirror on the ceiling so it would have to be 5. Will you be offering cuddles afterwards?

[sms316]

Sms have you submitted all your aliases before the deadline?Do I have an alias?

[Ned]

Suggest you imagine the scenario is silk sheets and mirror on the ceiling so it would have to be 5.

Solarmans Palace?

[Captain Nemo]

Welcome to the club. They provide ample support yet still give the feeling of being free and wild. I prefer satin.Never worn on the course though. Some fear of jock rot there. What fabric do you recommend, cotton or a Lycra spandex blend?

[jaybam]

Do I have an alias? No I said aliases as in more than one.

[sms316]

What fabric do you recommend, cotton or a Lycra spandex blend? Cotton son. Nothing else comes close.

[sms316]

No I said aliases as in more than one. Well there you go. I don't know anything about creating aliases.

[Jarro]

Do you think you'll be the next OzGolfer to be banned ?

[sms316]

Do you think you'll be the next OzGolfer to be banned ? Probably. Depends on whether I call you a .....

[markTHEblake]

Will you be offering cuddles afterwards?

you cant ask questions in this thread. you can only answer them. If you want to ask me you got to start my own thread.

[timah!]

Probably. Depends on whether I call you a .....

He likes Nickelback - he's fair game!

[Jarro]

He likes Nickelback - he's fair game!

post reported !

[IamViva]

http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/248/228/46e.jpg

will recent newly weds Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger collaboration/duo be as successful as Sonny and Cher?

[jaybam]

Well there you go. I don't know anything about creating aliases. On that sir I call bullshit. ;)

[LarryLong]

Is jock rot a real medical condition, or just something you made up?

[Jarro]

Will the Canberra Raiders win another premiership in your lifetime ?

[Lobsta]

You should room with dc68. He'll harvest the hair for you. Just don't ask where they are from.

+1

[sms316]

Will the Canberra Raiders win another premiership in your lifetime ? Not while David Furner is coaching them.

[sms316]

Is jock rot a real medical condition, or just something you made up? I believe it is real, but Rivers undies are the antidote.

[dc68]

+1

Says he who was watching SMS get nuded up with my golf bag.....

[Lobsta]

Says he who was watching SMS get nuded up with my golf bag.....

Hey! Did you see that my eyes became smoking craters in my face? No, that's right, they didn't. Because my eyes were firmly shut during the nuding up process.

[PeteyD]

Sure I heard you peeked more than once.

Jock Rot is a tinea infection of the jock area. SMS is talking about chaffing.

[LarryLong]

Sure I heard you peeked more than once.

Jock Rot is a tinea infection of the jock area. SMS is talking about chaffing.

SMS, do you think Petey is accusing you of hypochondria?

[sms316]

SMS, do you think Petey is accusing you of hypochondria? Who knows? It could be yet another case of mod persecution.

[Haystacks]

Shaun/Sean/Shawn/Shorn,
Why is it that a mix of dried fruit, seeds and nuts is called "trail mix"?

[dc68]

Cos you can drop them in the forest so you can find your way back out?

[Captain Nemo]

Cos you can drop them in the forest so you can find your way back out?

I beg to differ, the birds and marsupials would eat them all up!
Plus this is SMS's thread.....:lol:

[sms316]

Shaun/Sean/Shawn/Shorn,
Why is it that a mix of dried fruit, seeds and nuts is called "trail mix"?
One of life's great questions. I have never actually eaten trail mix, as it isn't available in pie form.

I'm thinking that eating that bird food will leave a nasty trail in the back of your undies.

[Dude, Where's my Par?]

why do flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?

[Webster]

Which Ozgolfer is the best ISG troll?

[sms316]

why do flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?
Not sure. Probably the same reason that "feral" and "Pine Rivers GC member" do as well.


Which Ozgolfer is the best ISG troll?
Trolling is illegal at OZgolf. If any of that sort of thing was going on, I'm sure the fine team of mods would be all over it.

[Peter]

Do you keep in touch with Dennis?

What are the advantages of a drug free water birth (apart from proving that you're tougher than other mums who needed drugs and dry land to pop out a little one)?

Is there anything that DC isn't favorite for?

[Dotty]

One of life's great questions. I have never actually eaten trail mix, as it isn't available in pie form.

That gives me an idea... If you had to invent a new pie, what would it be?

[Captain Nemo]

Golo 33/360 or Red X3 33/350?

[Lagerlover]

Is there another word for synonym?

[sms316]

That gives me an idea... If you had to invent a new pie, what would it be?
Question of the thread thus far.

My favourite pizza is the Pizza Capers "Gulf of Mexico" which contains black Angus steak, nacho beans, olives, jalapeños, mozzarella, onions, guacamole, salsa sauce, sour cream & chives. I would go for those ingredients in a pie, but with the guacamole and sour cream put on top when serving. Kind of like a calzone I guess.

Pure awesomeness.

[Lobsta]

Question of the thread thus far.

My favourite pizza is the Pizza Capers "Gulf of Mexico" which contains black Angus steak, nacho beans, olives, jalapeños, mozzarella, onions, guacamole, salsa sauce, sour cream & chives. I would go for those ingredients in a pie, but with the guacamole and sour cream put on top when serving. Kind of like a calzone I guess.

Pure awesomeness.

I would happily invest capital in this idea.

Best idea of your life!

[sms316]

Do you keep in touch with Dennis?

No. I almost miss him.


What are the advantages of a drug free water birth (apart from proving that you're tougher than other mums who needed drugs and dry land to pop out a little one)?

Got me stuffed why anybody would choose to complicate childbirth when it is bloody dangerous at the best of times.

They could be trying to start a master race of humans who form gills at birth.


Is there anything that DC isn't favorite for?
Possibly the next papacy. Depends of whether they serve Jim Beam Devil's Cut in The Vatican.

[sms316]

Golo 33/360 or Red X3 33/350?
Odyssey White Hot Tour #5.

[sms316]

Is there another word for synonym?
Yes.

[Lobsta]

Depends of whether they serve Jim Beam Devil's Cut in The Vatican.

My guess is no...

[Yossarian]

Did you ever get hold of Rubin's golf bag at champs?

[jaybam]

Nothing wrong or dangerous with water births. My two youngest are both drug free water births. Less painful I am told by someone who has experience in both types of births. Nothing dangerous about being born in water either as they are already in fluid.

[sms316]

Did you ever get hold of Rubin's golf bag at champs?
No, and I actually had an opportunity. Something inside me suggested it wasn't a good idea. He gave off that mass murderer kind of vibe.

[Dotty]

I would happily invest capital in this idea.

Wrong.

As of Xmas Day, it's not your capital anymore.

[Peter]

Has losing so much weight affected your golf?

[sms316]

Has losing so much weight affected your golf?
Time to come clean. I've put on about 5kg since the challenge which is pretty embarrassing. Time to get back off the sauce.

As for my golf, it certainly has. I find it so much easier to work the ball in both directions. I was the happy hooker beforehand, but I became darth fader a few months back. Now the big draw is starting to creep back in. My current handicap is +0.4, which would be the lowest I've been for a couple of years.

[Lagerlover]

Nothing wrong or dangerous with water births. My two youngest are both drug free water births. Less painful I am told by someone who has experience in both types of births. Nothing dangerous about being born in water either as they are already in fluid.

Really??

21578

[Captain Nemo]

Odyssey White Hot Tour #5.

Hahahahaha your a F*&^%'n genius!
I played a round with my dad in Griffith last Sunday and thats the putter i have down there.
Putted so well with it, i brought it back, hence my wanting the Golo or Red X!!!
Great minds and all that......;)

[Peter]

Time to come clean. I've put on about 5kg since the challenge which is pretty embarrassing.Good luck, would be a shame to blow up after all that hard work.Next question - why is Jaybam so angry all the time?

[sms316]

Next question - why is Jaybam so angry all the time?
Not sure, but I do know that he is very capable of beating the living suitcase out of me so it is best that I don't piss him off.

[jaybam]

Not sure, but I do know that he is very capable of beating the living suitcase out of me so it is best that I don't piss him off. I'm not angry you idiot. Just misunderstood. As for you SMS your a cuddly looking person and I like cuddly people. Oh and apart from your silly support of Canberra you are a fellow blues supporter so know my pain.

[Peter]

I blame QLD.

[Johnny Canuck]

Hahahahaha your a F*&^%'n genius!I played a round with my dad in Griffith last Sunday and thats the putter i have down there.Putted so well with it, i brought it back, hence my wanting the Golo or Red X!!!Great minds and all that......;)Funny that. I have recently switched to a White Hot 5 Centre Shaft. Fantastic putter. PGA value guide estimates it is worth $8.54.

[sms316]

I picked one up on eBay the other day for $35. Had one about 5 or 6 years back and regretted offloading it ever since.

[Johnny Canuck]

I picked one up on eBay the other day for $35. Had one about 5 or 6 years back and regretted offloading it ever since. I have used it for about 3 rounds so far and haven't hit a bad putt with it. Cracks me up that the grip I put on it us worth more than the $25 I paid for it.

[3Puttpete]

Why is orange jam called marmalade?

[Captain Nemo]

Why is orange jam called marmalade?

Thats prob a betterer q for google....
:lol:
http://lmgtfy.com/?q=why+is+orange+jam+called+marmalade

[Lobsta]

Thats prob a betterer q for google....
:lol:
http://lmgtfy.com/?q=why+is+orange+jam+called+marmalade

Post reported. You're not SMS.

[AndyP]

He's one of SMS's approved aliases.

[sms316]

He's one of SMS's approved aliases. I have aliases?

[PerryGroves]

Which Ozgolfer is the best ISG troll?

Jack, you didn't get an answer, assuming you and SMS get a podium finishes, can I ask, what is the point?

Is trolling about losing in life and winning online cred or have I missed the subtlety.

[Pieface]

Funny that. I have recently switched to a White Hot 5 Centre Shaft. Fantastic putter. PGA value guide estimates it is worth $8.54.

The Pieface weapon of choice. There is hope for you yet Canuck

[sms316]

Jack, you didn't get an answer, assuming you and SMS get a podium finishes, can I ask, what is the point?Is trolling about losing in life and winning online cred or have I missed the subtlety. I doubt that many people here would suggest that Jack and I have different personalities away from the forum. I personally enjoy banter (especially when witnessing shanking). If that makes me a troll, then so be it, but I doubt it.

[Lobsta]

I doubt that many people here would suggest that Jack and I have different personalities away from the forum. I personally enjoy banter (especially when witnessing shanking). If that makes me a troll, then so be it, but I doubt it.

Sms: troll IRL.

[Webster]

Jack, you didn't get an answer, assuming you and SMS get a podium finishes, can I ask, what is the point?

I don't have the energy to troll the muppets over there. I do look in occasionally though to see whats happening with the angry zenolink bloke and to see what they are moaning about (golf costs too much, where should I join in Melbourne, gun laws, etc). Tolmij is the best stirrer there by far. I dont think he posts here though.

[backintheswing]

SMS, how do you join club 14?

[sms316]

SMS, how do you join club 14? Post some boobs on the forum or use swear words. Most would prefer you post boobs.

[Hatchman]

Post some boobs on the forum or use swear words. Most would prefer you post boobs.

Man boobs are offensive and deserve a penalty.

[Lagerlover]

Im watching something as well....how does Linda get it all the way down?

[Yossarian]

Jack, you didn't get an answer, assuming you and SMS get a podium finishes, can I ask, what is the point?

Is trolling about losing in life and winning online cred or have I missed the subtlety.

Most of them are Yoss.

[dc68]

The Pieface weapon of choice. There is hope for you yet Canuck


I was googling a bottle of 1795 JB that was won in a raffle and lo and behold one of the forums that came up had a reply from a Pieface in Perth... One and the same I assume?

[Dude, Where's my Par?]

Most of them are Yoss.
I heard Yoss is also Tolmij,
SMS, how do you rate Twin Waters, is it a great course?

[sms316]

I heard Yoss is also Tolmij,
SMS, how do you rate Twin Waters, is it a great course?
Never played it. However, I would suggest that there isn't a great course in Queensland. Anyone who thinks otherwise either has low standards or doesn't understand what great means.

[Dude, Where's my Par?]

Never played it. However, I would suggest that there isn't a great course in Queensland. Anyone who thinks otherwise either has low standards or doesn't understand what great means.
haha, nothing less than I expected :)

I played it Monday for the first time, nice course off the back pegs. Doesn't feel like your typical resprt course.

[Haystacks]

SMS,

Why would Sail & Anchor make a carton of beer with only 16 stubbies in it?

[hocko]

SMS,

Why would Sail & Anchor make a carton of beer with only 16 stubbies in it?

Dickhead West Australians!....can't count.

[hocko]

SMS,

Why would Sail & Anchor make a carton of beer with only 16 stubbies in it?

If Schaughn doesn't mind then I will answer this question.
If they packed 24 stubbies in the box then the price of the carton would be just as expensive as a carton of pre mix cans. About $80.

[sms316]

I don't mind at all. In NZ they sell Steinlager in packs of either 10 or 12 (I can't remember). Not the worst size for a casual night.

[hocko]

I don't mind at all. In NZ they sell Steinlager in packs of either 10 or 12 (I can't remember). Not the worst size for a casual night.

Quiet night? :)

[sms316]

Quiet night? :) It was my honeymoon. Had to maintain performance.

[hocko]

:)
Understood

[Haystacks]

It was my honeymoon. Had to maintain performance.

First or second?

[sms316]

First or second? Second.

[Shadesy]

Dear Shaun

When is the Qld Champs and is it right that If I go my wife wants to buy a puppy as a compromise?

Regards

Shadesy

[Shadesy]

Dear Shaun

Will my antics be praised or looked down upon at the QLD champs?

Regards

Shadesy

[sms316]

A couple of good questions. Firstly, I find it ironic that the Qld Champs look like being played in NSW.

It's one thing to get a puppy, but under no circumstances should you get sucked in to letting the dog sleep in your bed. This is a real mood buster.

You will be very welcome over here mate. I'll let you have a photo with the Nullabor Cup.

[hocko]

Schaughn, will business be better or worse this year? Also will my sex life improve this year now that my youngest child is now 20 months old?

[sms316]

Schaughn, will business be better or worse this year? Also will my sex life improve this year now that my youngest child is now 20 months old? Probably busier. You get it too easy. Your sex life might improve, but your 20yo will get plenty.

[hocko]

I don't have a 20 year old but I want one!

[sms316]

Oh dear.

Your 20 month old will not be getting any.

[hocko]

Did you seriously think my youngest is a 20yo???? Thanks! :(

[PeteyD]

There is no QLD champs, there is the Ozgolf champs.

[sms316]

Did you seriously think my youngest is a 20yo???? Thanks! :( Can I hire a crane? I'm digging a hole.

[sms316]

There is no QLD champs, there is the Ozgolf champs. They're in WA.

[hocko]

:)

[TourFit]

Can I hire a crane? I'm digging a hole.

Nope...it's already dug. What you need is a ladder!

[Haystacks]

SMS,

Will Lagerlover be cured of the sherman tanks before he ventures to Vegas?

[sms316]

Hey Tzaun, are you any good at organising Champs stuff ?
Not as good as you buddy. When are you starting a 2013 Wynnum Cup EOI thread?

[sms316]

SMS,

Will Lagerlover be cured of the sherman tanks before he ventures to Vegas?
I hope not. Shanks are funny.

[Monsta]

SMS

Is one of your aliases "shanksarefunny" ??

[sms316]

SMS

Is one of your aliases "shanksarefunny" ??
I can't confirm having any form of alias.

[Dude, Where's my Par?]

SMS, diet coke or pepsi max?

[sms316]

SMS, diet coke or pepsi max?
Neither. Diet drinks are horrible. I'd much prefer to drink soda water or mineral water.

[WBennett]

Szechuan

When are we starting the fat boy challenge 2013? It seems a few of you 'athlete's' have fallen on hard times now the comp is over...

[Lagerlover]

I hope not. Shanks are funny.

Clowns are funny... shanks are gods way of telling me that all the good shots have been taken.

[sms316]

Clowns are funny... shanks are gods way of telling me that all the good shots have been taken. Clowns hitting shanks is even funnier.

[jaybam]

Clowns hitting shanks is even funnier. Good post sms. One of your better ones.

[Haystacks]

Good post sms. One of your better ones.

:shock:

[markTHEblake]

SMS, should I admit that in Lagers playoff for Vegas I was secretly cheering for a shank?

[Lagerlover]

SMS, should I admit that I took it for granted that MTB would quite easily stand by and watch an innocent women get head butted, then make sure that the perpetrator is treated like the victim?

[markTHEblake]

That's a damn lie. You know very well that the women was not innocent.

[sms316]

Shane which champs are you attending this year ? I am a certainty for WA. Qld depends on date.

[Johnny Canuck]

Good man. Some "c--- eggs" will be chilling on ice for your arrival.

[Monsta]

SMS,

Toilet paper, over or under on the holder???

[Xray]

Shaun,

can you tell me where I put my stud finder? (no homo)

[sms316]

SMS,Toilet paper, over or under on the holder??? Under.

[sms316]

Shaun,can you tell me where I put my stud finder? (no homo) Ask henno.

[Bruce]

Under.

I knew there was something not right about you.

[sms316]

I knew there was something not right about you. It's a left handed thing.

[markTHEblake]

SMS, what is wrong with being a homo?

[sms316]

SMS, what is wrong with being a homo? Any bloke who doesn't like boobs can't be trusted.

[markTHEblake]

I know this homo who said he loves boobs but ... ( I can't finish the sentence here ).

But the same principle applies I guess.

[Monsta]

I knew there was something not right about you.


It's a left handed thing.

No excuses Shoren,

This just proves that there is something seriously wrong with you......

[Dude, Where's my Par?]

How do they get the teflon to stick to the frying pan?

[sms316]

How do they get the teflon to stick to the frying pan?
It actually doesn't, but rather the steel is roughed up in a way that the plastic cannot slide off.

[sms316]

When you play monopoly which token do you use ?
Always used to play the hat.

[Shadesy]

dearest Shaun


I rate your opinion on golf courses, but why do you hate on Nudgee GC so much?

Cheers Shadesy

[sms316]

dearest ShaunI rate your opinion on golf courses, but why do you hate on Nudgee GC so much?Cheers Shadesy
Finally. A question of substance in this thread.

When I first moved to Qld I actually played Nudgee first up, with the intention of joining it. Unfortunately it failed the first impression test miserably.The staff in the Pro Shop were completely useless, especially the fat bastard in the check in point.

The course itself is quite boring to be honest. Flat as a tack, which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it is just dull. The track is full of holes that just force you to hit to a certain point and then go from there. A B grader would love it, but a low market will feel that he is not getting value off the tee.

The greens were shit.

And the round took 5 hours.

[live4golf]

Shaun,

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a wood chuck would chuck wood?

[sms316]

Shaun,How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a wood chuck would chuck wood? Waffle Iron.

[Monsta]

Shaun,

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a wood chuck would chuck wood?


Waffle Iron.

Best answer yet SMS

[markTHEblake]

Sms there are a lot of vague questions in this thread. what is actually your special area of knowledge that we should be taking advantage of here ?
(every other Ask X had some sort of speciality)

[Hatchman]

I know this homo who said he loves boobs but ... ( I can't finish the sentence here ). But the same principle applies I guess. Lady Boys come on down. He can have it all.

[sms316]

Sms there are a lot of vague questions in this thread. what is actually your special area of knowledge that we should be taking advantage of here ?(every other Ask X had some sort of speciality) Blue cheese, trolling, mathematics and common sense.

[dc68]

Shaun... If there is grass on the wicket?

[sms316]

Shaun... If there is grass on the wicket? Then it is time to go to Brazilian Beauty.

[bergsey]

SMS, spit or swallow ?

[sms316]

SMS, spit or swallow ? I'm happy for you to spit.

[timah!]

What is worse, smoking a joint on course, or using a broomstick/belly putter?

[sms316]

What is worse, smoking a joint on course, or using a broomstick/belly putter? Both are seemingly performance enhancing.

[timah!]

Haha.

[popper81]

SMS,

What is the best knick-name you have come across in your travels?

Who is your tip for the next ozgolfer to join club 14?

If the QLD champs & WA champs clash in 2013, which will you attend?

What is the best way to cook a feed of prawns?

Is common sense a 'learned' behaviour, or is it more that you have got it, or you don't?

[LeftyHoges]

SMS,

What is the best knick-name you have come across in your travels?

Who is your tip for the next ozgolfer to join club 14?

If the QLD champs & WA champs clash in 2013, which will you attend?

What is the best way to cook a feed of prawns?

Is common sense a 'learned' behaviour, or is it more that you have got it, or you don't?

Asking the hard-hitting questions now Pop!

[rubin]

Zhaon,

I have just had the better part of 2 and a half months off from golf, and decided that my comeback game will be Sunday at the WAGC Summer Cup.

Was this a wise decision, and will my golf be the better for it?

Secondly, how many pills would u suggest i pack in the back for this return. I would thing 1 doz. should be enough, but I await your expertise.

[sms316]

SMS,

What is the best knick-name you have come across in your travels?

Who is your tip for the next ozgolfer to join club 14?

If the QLD champs & WA champs clash in 2013, which will you attend?

What is the best way to cook a feed of prawns?

Is common sense a 'learned' behaviour, or is it more that you have got it, or you don't?

In order;

The pro at Albury used to just refer to me as "fat ****". That was imaginative.

JohnnyCanuck.

WA. I've stated this more than once.

On skewers on the BBQ. Marinated in lime juice and sweet chilli.

Common sense is learned. You still have hope.

[Dude, Where's my Par?]

would you like to talk us through your best played/most memorable hole of golf?

what is the second most exciting thing you have seen out on the beat?

[Lobsta]

what is the second most exciting thing you have seen out at the beat?
FTFY.

Edit: for the out of towners: http://www.thebeatmegaclub.com.au/content.php?pageid=home

[Dude, Where's my Par?]

FTFY.

Edit: for the out of towners: http://www.thebeatmegaclub.com.au/content.php?pageid=home

designed for a follow up question :)

[sms316]

would you like to talk us through your best played/most memorable hole of golf? Easy. I shot 74 in a gale at NSWGC in their open event. It dead set felt like I had 64. The 6th is a 190m par 3 with cliff/ocean to the left. I hit a 3 iron that started at least 20m out over the water and the wind ripped it back on the green to about 40 feet. Binned the putt for a 2.

[sms316]

what is the second most exciting thing you have seen out on the beat? Hastings St, Noosa. Main Beach is pretty special.

[PerryGroves]

Zhaon,

I have just had the better part of 2 and a half months off from golf, and decided that my comeback game will be Sunday at the WAGC Summer Cup.

Was this a wise decision, and will my golf be the better for it?

Secondly, how many pills would u suggest i pack in the back for this return. I would thing 1 doz. should be enough, but I await your expertise.

SMS, am I missing the point of this thread?

Does it work both ways, that is, we ask a question about your good self or alternatively is it an opportunity to ramble on about ourselves. I am more happy with the latter as I have a lot of stories and witty anecdotes involving.....well, me.

[live4golf]

Ford or Holden?

Innie or Outie?

Tuck left or tuck right?

[Dude, Where's my Par?]

21792

SMS, what answer do you get for this question?

[WBennett]

SheeYawn

Why did Sydney Thunder suck so much?
Why do all the teams you support suck so much?
For the good of your homeland, do you mind becoming a Queensland supporter for a year?

[3Puttpete]

SMS,

Something from Max Brenner's summer menu or one of the old favourites?

[sms316]

Zhaon,

I have just had the better part of 2 and a half months off from golf, and decided that my comeback game will be Sunday at the WAGC Summer Cup.

Was this a wise decision, and will my golf be the better for it?

You will either have none or a ton. Nothing in between.


Secondly, how many pills would u suggest i pack in the back for this return. I would thing 1 doz. should be enough, but I await your expertise.
NFI. How much water is at this track?

[sms316]

SMS, am I missing the point of this thread?

Does it work both ways, that is, we ask a question about your good self or alternatively is it an opportunity to ramble on about ourselves. I am more happy with the latter as I have a lot of stories and witty anecdotes involving.....well, me.
If you figure out what the point of this thread is feel free to let the rest of us know.

[sms316]

Ford or Holden?
Couldn't give a shit personally. V8 racing bores the shit out of me.

Innie or Outie?
Innie. Outies should be burned at the stake.

Tuck left or tuck right?
Origami.

[sms316]

SheeYawn

Why did Sydney Thunder suck so much?
Why do all the teams you support suck so much?
For the good of your homeland, do you mind becoming a Queensland supporter for a year?
1. They spent most of their salary cap on guy who did SFA for 6 of the 7 games that he played.
2. Probably karma. I might start following AFL and support Collingwood.
3. I'd rather be a loser than a Queenslander.

[sms316]

SMS,

Something from Max Brenner's summer menu or one of the old favourites?
Had to Google that one. A chocolate bar on Oxford St sounds kind of dangerous to be honest.

[3Puttpete]

Had to Google that one. A chocolate bar on Oxford St sounds kind of dangerous to be honest. It's Bulimba, not Darlinghurst

[sms316]

21792

SMS, what answer do you get for this question?
I'm too bloody lazy to work this out to be honest. Just got back from Rainbow Beach where I did about 5 minutes of work before going for a swim with a good sort who filled out a bikini quite nicely.

I need to wait for the blood to return to the brain.

[Shadesy]

a good sort who filled out a bikini quite nicely.




Dear Shaun

What Colour bikini were you wearing?

Regards

Shadesy

[sms316]

Dear Shaun

What Colour bikini were you wearing?

Regards

Shadesy
Blue board shorts here. I had concerns that Greenpeace may have been called in.

[Dotty]

5 mins work? Are you now a sub-editor for the local fish wrapper?

[Monsta]

Oh wise one (snicker snicker)

I realise that asking a serious question is COMPLETELY out of place here, but...........

Why do Ping irons have the indentation on the hosel??????
21807

[kingslayer33]

No point asking SMS. Pretty sure he has never hit a Sherman in his life.

[Monsta]

No point asking SMS. Pretty sure he has never hit a Sherman in his life.

But he thinks their funny......

[kingslayer33]

Agreed, but even funnier when he thinks you may upset Henno, or the narwhals, with your comment. :)

[Lobsta]

Oh wise one (snicker snicker)

I realise that asking a serious question is COMPLETELY out of place here, but...........

Why do Ping irons have the indentation on the hosel??????
21807

Marketing tool aimed at Shavey.

[Webster]

SMS, would a lady who subscribes to the theory and practice of Zenolink, therefore possessing well above average ground forces, be stronger in the doggy?

[sms316]

SMS, would a lady who subscribes to the theory and practice of Zenolink, therefore possessing well above average ground forces, be stronger in the doggy? Strength in the doggy is a very important characteristic in a woman. Without strength, you may as well be throwing a sausage down a hallway. As for Zenolink assisting strength in the doggy, well it is possible. Perhaps this is a question best asked on ISG, however the sook that flogs Zenolink over there would probably have another meltdown.