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Ducky
17th November 2004, 07:30 PM
I was convinced that a bit of "biffo" was going to break out between myself and another member from a club not too far from mine. Basically, the argument was in relation to golf etiquette after an incident on the 18th hole.

Myself, two other friends, and two Japanese exchange students (who were visiting my friends) were half way down the 18th hole (which is around 380m) at the time. We looked around to check if anyone was behind us before continuing. There was one man, however, he placed his gear next to the other tee box, so we assumed he was heading in the other direction on the 3rd hole. We continued.

Three of us were inside 150m of the green already (I was around 70m off the green after I killed my drive :wink:) and were waiting on the Japanese exchange students to hit. We walked around 10m more, and noticed a ball roll up behind us. Looking back, there was the man (mentioned earlier) on the 18th tee box.

We continued walking to the distance our balls were positioned at and waited in the rough next to the fairway (as we noticed the man hurrying up quickly to his ball). We waited and observed him hit his second shot, which was a worm burner over to the right hand side rough.

We continued to wait as he went searching for his ball. He was unable to find it, so I walked over and pointed it out to him (as I knew were it ended up).

We finally all hit up to the green, and I holed out quickly as I needed to be heading off by 7:00pm. I said 'good bye' to the others as I walked off to the car, but was stopped by the man who had hit up on us.

He asked if anyone was a member at the club. I replied that I was, but the rest were not. He started questioning my golfing etiquette (which I thought was ironic considering he just missed hitting us with his drive off the tee) and why I had not called him through. I explained to him that we were already over half way to completing the hole, and did not believe that calling him through would have sped up the playing process as it was the last hole anyway. I apologised and said had it been any other hole I would have called him through, and started to walk to the car once again.

Now, matters started to take a turn for the worst. In a raised voice (which would have caught the attention of players on the other greens close by), he stated that I did not respect the rules of golf and that as a member I should have known better. He continued that as a paying player for 18 holes, he should not have had to wait whilst we finished out the hole. Cutting in, I explained that we were also paying players but because we teed off so late, we had only been able to play 3 holes [10, 11, and 18].

I could sympathise with his point that we had cut in front of him, but at the time when we had teed off, he was not visible on the 17th hole.

After he continued to make a scene, I finally stated that he did not deserve to be respected if he could not be patient for two minutes whilst the group in front of him finished out the hole.

I continued to the car, put my gear in, and hopped in the passenger seat. Of course, this didn't discourage him at all, and he proceeded to the drivers seat window (where my mum was sitting), and decided to make things a little more personal (using my mum as leverage considering that she didn't want to sit there arguing about a situation she had not been present for).

He asked for my name, which I was happy to give to him, and as an attempt to try and end the argument, I suggested that he lodge a complaint and I would discuss it with the club professional next time I saw him. This wasn't good enough for him (as he noted that the club professional would probably agree with me). Instead, he decided to undermine my name, age, and manners (which would apparently get my ass kicked in the army) in an effort to get me to admit I was wrong (which I did not believe I was).

At this point, I was certain the only way to end the argument would have been to get out of the car and settle it with "fisty cuffs" (which I am sure is obviously what he wanted considering he would not discontinue his abuse).

Finally, after several more minutes of arguing through the car window, he must have come to the conclusion that he was over reacting, and started to walk off to his car.

So, obviously I am going to have to discuss this with the club professional next time I see him (whether or not the man decides to lodge a complaint). But what do you guys reckon? Was I in the wrong? Should I have called him through or continued playing?

Anyway, if you've made it this far, thanks for reading.

Kind regards,

Ben (Ducky).

davidp
17th November 2004, 07:40 PM
It sounds like he was pi$$ed off at something else and you just happened to be a convenient target for him to let off some steam.

You may have made an honest mistake in cutting in front of him, but you acknowledged that to him and apologised. At that point, the conversation should have ended.

I think he has a severe hormone imbalance and should consult his family doctor immediately. :smt100

AndyP
17th November 2004, 08:36 PM
Seems strange that he chose to approach you in the carpark and not say anything to you on the 18th.

Ducky
17th November 2004, 08:43 PM
No, it started on the 18th green.


We finally all hit up to the green, and I holed out quickly as I needed to be heading off by 7:00pm. I said 'good bye' to the others as I walked off to the car, but was stopped by the man who had hit up on us.

Kind regards,

Ben (Ducky).

markTHEblake
17th November 2004, 09:29 PM
Dont discuss this with anyone. Put it in writing, then request a meeting with your GM, captain or whoever is in charge of the members, to hand in the letter personally.

Irrespective of your own actions, no member has the right to treat another in a threatening and abusive manner. If you dont put this in writing the club wont do anything about it.

You deserve the right to be able to walk through your golf course without fear of any confrontation with this moron.

At least you can copy paste from here, save you typing it again.

Keza_G
17th November 2004, 10:07 PM
I have had a similar incident and understand how you felt...

Put all this into your GM, Committee &/or Captain/President. I do not believe that you were in the wrong...calling up a single player is usual ettiquette however it seems a bit pointless in doing so on the last hole....

It only serves to make your group wait longer and him to feel pressure in hitting in front of you... I beleive the mistake made here was that he actually hit up on you and that he obviously has his knickers in a knot over something... you've become a scapegoat...

Feel proud that you have been able to be a vent for some poor fools anger, maybe he went home a little better after letting off the steam.... he could have had an accident had he not let it go.... Some people believe it there right to vent anger at others... maybe you have come across the latest fad..... Golf Course Carpark Rage..or GCCR....

Feel safe in the notion that you did nothing wrong or underhanded.... golf goes on....

Cheers

Keza

3oneday
17th November 2004, 10:16 PM
Duck,

I reckon if you play the correct sequence of holes, and then come to a tee where someone has clearly jumped in front of you, you should be afforded right of way.

No excuses for the way this guy carried on, obviously a complete tool, carrying on like that means he really loses any rights to firstly play our game and secondly be part of society.

IMHO of course :wink:

Pete

Ducky
17th November 2004, 10:41 PM
Pete,

Yes I agree in that sense. However, at the time he was not visible on the 17th hole when we were teeing off (I double checked this), and it was of a greater likelihood that he had done the route we had [10, 11, 18], as opposed to the whole 18 holes.

If we were not on the 18th hole or were closer to the tee box, I would have called him through, as I know how frustrating it is to wait behind another group when you are by yourself. On the same token, I think that most people acknowledge that playing through on the 18th is not really productive to playing speeds anyway.

I have considered lodging a complaint of my own. However, at this point in time I am extremely busy (this was the first chance I have had to play in the last two weeks and it was only three holes), and to tell the truth I really don't want to waste anymore time than I have to on this issue with writing letters and organising meetings.

I do not feel threatened by him or worried about him confronting me again. My main concerns out of this have been that I may have my membership taken away if he was to bend the truth of what happened (highly likely), and that my mum had to witness (and be a part of) the argument.

It is worth noting that he is a member of a club in a town close by, not the town where I am currently at.

Kind regards,

Ben (Ducky).

markTHEblake
17th November 2004, 11:04 PM
You mean he is not a member of the club that you were playing at?
Your not a member either right?

Forget all about it then.

Ducky
17th November 2004, 11:49 PM
No, I am a member at the club where this happened, he is not.

Kind regards,

Ben (Ducky).

3oneday
18th November 2004, 07:15 AM
Duck,

Fair enough then, if he isn't a member, stuff him. The worst that will happen is he will ring and complain, the club will say they will look into it.

The fact that it occurred during a social round means your club will have very little interest, pay him lip service and do nuthin.

What MTB said, nuthin to worry about AT ALL....

Pete

amanda
18th November 2004, 08:02 AM
Ducky - he was probably annoyed at having an audience for his bad shots!

Fishman Dan
18th November 2004, 09:06 AM
My 11c (gst inc).

If he's playing solo, cut in or not, he can see there are players ahead of him. He shouldn't have teed up with players in range. I think the club would be aghast (good word huh ;)) at hearing that players are putting each other at risk in the current litigeous climate.

If i was approached by someone carrying on like a pork chop and trying to intimidate me, i'd walk away. If you can't conduct an appropriate conversation, then inform the 'gentleman' that until he can do so, you won't give him any of your time.

And to bring a 3rd party into it (in this case, your mum) is poor as well. Perhaps he had grounds to challenge your views on golf 'ettiquette', but there's also social ettiquette which implies that you don't carry on like that.

wavemaker
18th November 2004, 11:57 AM
no chance of just snotting him eh ducky :lol:

Ducky
19th November 2004, 04:24 PM
I thought it was definitely on the cards.

:shock:

Kind regards,

Ben (Ducky).

wavemaker
19th November 2004, 04:30 PM
ducky, i would never advocate resorting to fisticuffs, but i have often found with those blustery types if you take it right up to them they back off and start whining.

Ducky
19th November 2004, 04:42 PM
Yeah, I try to avoid confrontation wherever possible. I do not see the point in making unnecessary enemies. Only due to the fact that he kept persisting with the issue even after I had dealt with him politely, would I have considered resorting to violence (he would have had to have the first swing).

:smt062

Kind regards,

Ben (Ducky).

Golfgirl
19th November 2004, 09:16 PM
Ducky,

Don't worry about it mate, the guy is a moron.

A single player never has right of way over a group, he wasn't in sight when you cut across, you apologised to him anyway, he isn't a member and you are....

What a shame that he tried to get your mother in on the dispute....

Just ignore it - I doubt this has the potential to go anywhere, even if he did make a complaint. (Which he won't have done.)

Jodie